Slow Crow

Slow Crow........

Sometimes I feel like a one-man crow overpopulation control. How are YOU helping to cure this epidemic?

Kitteh!

The vulture on the right is coming to the slow realization that he fell into a trap. Enter Semi stage left. Two seconds later, the vultures join their feline friend.

Fox assumes the position

Heh, I think he was making fun of the raccoon. Instant karma.

Incontinent Raccoon

I have to laugh - this little feller was so scared, he peed himself before we got him!

I'm so glad to see companies making such high quality merchandise these days. Put this and the smeared raccoon mat on your front porch, and nature will know to keep a safe distance. Probably salesmen too, so, Double Whammy!

Punxsutawney Phil

I've actually got no clue what this is. We'll call it a groundhog. Add a little syrup, and you've got one crazy pancake.

Coolest carpet in the world!

This would be perfect for my front door! There's a company that actually sells these. Nothing says "Welcome!" better than smeared raccoon.

Frog Uprising

Word on the street was that the bullfrogs were raising an army. Big props to our alert friends who quickly quelled the amphibian demonstration on our streets.

Giraffe meets Airplane

Giraffe necks are a little stronger than you'd expect.

Mitsubishi Evo IX creams Seagull

The Evo was reported to have been going 180 mph when they hit the seagull. The last thing to go through that bird's mind was its butt...

Kangaroos are the deer of Australia

Natural selection in action. Seems that Aussies are just as concerned about protecting their roads are we are about ours. That driver must have been going pretty quick for the roo to be that far embedded in his grille. He gets a virtual e-prize for his effort.

Now I've heard unproven claims that kangaroos can jump. I've never seen it happen, but I suppose it's possible. However, from the extensive evidence I've gathered, it looks like they can jump about as high as their duck-billed cousin the platypus.

"Above and beyond the call of duty"

This cop could have simply shot the cow in the road and killed it. But that wouldn't have had the same effect as swerving with his cruiser and plowing it over at 60 mph, now would it? In any case, the message is clear: If you're not human, stay off our roads. Also, don't mess with cops. Those guys are crazy!

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think this is called Poetic Justice

Just what it looks like. A Roadrunner van hits a roadrunner.

Roadrunner thinks they're 'brothers' and can share the road
Van driver sees the bird's point, but knows that if you make an exception for one animal, then they all want to be the exception
Van driver proceeds to make an example of said roadrunner
Van driver understands the irony, and chuckles a little as he takes the picture
Roadrunner learns its lesson

Ok, so you've heard about those deer whistles, right?

They're supposed to scare away the deer for some reason. Here's some strong new evidence that they don't work. This oldsmobile had two deer whistles on his car, but when he hit the deer (pictured top-right), it actually knocked the whistles off. Apparently, they only make deer angry, so they're MORE likely to play in the road. They're kind of like the pied piper's pipe.

Geo Metro vs Black Angus

This is probably the first time I've seen where the animal hit was actually bigger than the car. This Metro hit a Black Angus cow. The dude lived, but he ended up with some nasty bruises. The cow - we're not quite sure what happened to him. The dude was knocked out for 20 minutes, and the cow was gone when he came to. Anyway, I'm sure the cow learned his lesson. I'm not quite sure what that lesson is, but he learned it.

Ford escort vs Moose - Result: Tie?

Yeah, the moose thought it was a tie. He almost thought he was going to get away with destroying a car scott free, until you listen to the end. Fortunately, the cops did their job. They had to make an example of him.

A motorcycle in the right hands can be an effective teaching tool

Would you believe that this is the after shot?

Good think it didn't have antlers, or that camera might have been broken!

Rubber Guillotine

You wouldn't think tires would make such effective deer lesson-teaching devices...but they do!

Moose, meet Rally Car. Rally Car, meet moose.

He hits that moose with his bumper so gracefully, it's inspiring. You'd think the impact would have given them whiplash, but no! They're true professionals.

When deer play truth or dare, I think they always pick Dare

Two things: This deer lost the dare. Second, that cop has amazing reflexes. If I were driving, I don't think I would have been able to swerve in time to hit it like he did. He's good. I can see why they hired him.

Got any grapes?


I think this exact same thing happened to me this morning. Except it wasn't raining. And I was on the highway. And there weren't any ducks. Other than that, it's like deja vu! Of course, the 'Got any Grapes?' comment refers to the joke where bartender threatens to nail the ducks beak to the bar. It's funny, because the duck got nailed...see?

Duck, duck? Goose!

You know, some geese are blessed with the gift of flight. Others...well...they prefer to walk South for the winter. Here's a handy tip: when you're hitchhiking, walk on the SIDE of the road!

MOOOOOOOVE Cow!

Paved or not, that's what the cow gets for standing in the middle of the road. Extra points to the driver for not totalling his car so he can "educate" any other dumb animal that gets in the way.

Proof positive that birds deserve everything they get

So I've been noticing that all of the google ads have been things like "Books for Pet Lovers" and "Adopt a Pet Here!" Buh? It seems to me that those ads aren't extrememly well targeted. In fact, this is exactly the kind of site that someone looking to adopt a furry animal would want to avoid. Shouldn't it be things like car and bumper repairs shops? Think Midas would want to start a link exchange with me? Heh!

Suicide Deer...no, seriously

This stupid thing actually jumped off an overpass into oncoming traffic. Try explaining that to your car insurance company. "A kamikaze deer jumped off a bridge? Right....."

I don't even want to know what's on the roof of that durango. Smeared deer.